Rebellion for Dummies

Rebellion for Dummies By an anonymous but regular author of Quack!, cause you never know how the administration would react!

Here’s a surefire way to make sure that you have a rebellion in your hands at the end of the semester:

  • Break every tradition in the book and make sure that the students are publicly humilated. How? (Um I Dunno, Like Ban Ragging!)
  • Increase the Fee of the Hostel by Rs.6000/- and tell the karachite that they don’t have room for them. (Umm, ok. No room for 50 students in a hostel that can accommodate over 150. Makes Sense.)
  • Hire Surly Bus Drivers who:
    1. Drive with out the students if they are late by 2 minutes.
    2. Accuse the students of smoking when they haven’t.
    3. Don’t take extra passengers even if their route is the same.
    4. Don’t let the students turn on the stereo in the two hour long ride.
  • When asking an Administration official a question the only reply you get, “Talk to the President!” (Eg. “Sir Can we Turn on our stereo in the Bus?” Reply is “Talk to the president this is not our problem.”)
  • Take precious time of the TISF Activities for Long Boring Lectures That No one even wants to hear. (Except maybe the President Himself!)
  • Censor and cross check everything the students do so that it’s reminded constantly that they are being watched! (Like Banning the Music Video in the Freshman Gala!)
  • Make sure that the gala starts late by keeping a Class in the Auditorium without prior notice.
  • Putting the squeeze on the students by increasing their work load by 2 folds!
  • Invite every kind of guest speaker and a Member of the Board of Governors to give long and lengthy speeches about how DEMOCRATIC the Institute is and go out and do precisely what you want! (Just about everything the President is doing. “When I make up my mind I do it!” and “I have a very open door policy!” Umm what good is that when you’ve already made up your mind?! )
  • Devise a system in the computer lab in which it is impossible to do anything productive and then increase power outages and internet breakdowns. (No sign of stopping that!)
  • And Last But Not the Least, DECREASING THE TIME OF THE CARNIVAL BY 3 HOURS AND BANNING ANY KIND OF NIGHT STAY IN THE HOSTEL!! (Nooooooooooooo!!)

By following the above trends and more to come, you’ll be sure to have a raging torrent of students at your door steps. The anger and discontent will be so venomous that the freshmen will leave without even having a reason, except maybe to go an institute which isn’t as stifling and, Oh soooo far away from Karachi!