Quack! Online

By Saad Saleem, TS1

Every campus has to have one of these. Raised in Jersey City, Edison or any Indian populated city in America, these guys do their best to replicate the style of a black man. Don’t get me wrong, every brown man wishes he had certain characteristics of a black man. OK that’s a wrong statement. Every brown man wishes he had one characteristic - a black man’s certain possession; everything else regarding a black man he doesn’t give a shit about. For black men, life is a big trade off. You’re blessed with big things but you also got the po-po’s on your bum. Getting back to our point, there are way too many desi guys acting like thugs.

It’s simple to identify super thugs: Read the rest of this entry »

The Textile Institute of Pakistan’s The people who C.A.R.E (Currently Are Really Envious) have issued a warning to all related industries to watch out for these miscreants, as they have a reputation for being most devious in nature. Informants have revealed that they have cells which can operate independently without active leadership - Khalifagiri.

Anyone who has their whereabouts please inform the class of TS4A Batch 2008, so necessary cheera’s can be deployed.

Read the rest of this entry »

In the United States, everyone is sexless.

Or maybe- and I’m just spitballing here — they don’t think women are so rare that they deserve to be stared at like crazy. After all, 50% of their population is female! Imagine!?

But then, the male to female ratio is the same here…

So why, and I’ll repeat this for emphasis, why do Pakistani men insist on staring at every women/girl/transsexual/slightly effeminate creature that crosses their path? Read the rest of this entry »

(Written by my 14 years old sister Rimsha Mehmood)

A singular notion was dawned upon me…betrayal. My thoughts wandered in the fields of gloom and misery. The infidelity crossed the boundaries. The intensity of pain increased as the lava of hatred boiled up inside me. These emotions were so strong that tears started flowing from my soar eyes. I could hear the whistling of the wind as it played with the flowers. I could not bear the silence any more, as it sucked away the all the happy memories inside me…perhaps this was a wrong sentence to bring into play ,I had no blissful moments preserved in my heart. My heart was sealed with sorrow and distress. I got up from my bed and made towards the window which protected but not separated me from the frosty and blustery weather of December. I stood there watching the birds fly high and the trees trying to catch them but they failed for they too were enchained. Read the rest of this entry »

There are a million ways to keep an idiot busy. Here’s just a few of them. Read the rest of this entry »

Stepping into the charming world of textiles was indeed a wonderful experience. Old but golden spinning processes, unlimited weave patterns, mind blowing colors, extensive dye combinations, breathtaking machineries, variety of knitted fabrics and last but not the least nostalgic fabric designs. I love textiles, not just because they are vibrant and attractive but also because these textiles have always remind me of my beloved.

Fabric formation or weaving process is known as the meeting of two yarns; warp and weft. Without warp, weft is nothing and without weft; warp can never imagine about any fabric pattern. Interestingly, the very similar story is with two love birds; the two lovers are like warp and weft and like these two threads, they also cannot live each other. If they are left alone, they will probably not be successful in the creation of a fabric of true relationships. Or in a more simplistic way, I also sometimes refer this warp-weft combination towards the emotions of two lovers. The way two threads are interlaced is quite alike the way dreams of lover and beloved are interlaced. In short, both warp (lover) and weft (beloved) can only get their true achievement of love if they can weave a proper fabric. Read the rest of this entry »

For those of you who have graduated recently here’s some more salt to your wounds…

Effective 10th November Comments and Cartoons of the Graduating Class 2007 will not be entertained.

Shocked? Don’t be, you didn’t submit anything to the magazine so i really won’t bother going into the specifics! Now nobody will know that you graduated this year except your Mom and Dad and maybe a brother or sister if you’re close to them….

The following Graduated Classes have NOT sent me their Comments and Cartoons, so no dice for you…

- Apparel Marketing and Manufacturing (AMM)
- Textile Marketing and Management (TMM)

So Last Call to Board the Train or Be Left Behind, No Second Call for Losers; Have too many Passengers on the Train anyhow!

May the Force be with you…. suckers!